Written by Clinical Psychologist, Katie Dobinson
The start of a new year often brings that “clean slate” feeling - a chance to pause, check in with yourself, and think about what changes you might like to make for a fulfilling year ahead. Maybe it's reducing the time you spend doom-scrolling, connecting more deeply with friends, or finally trying out that hobby you’ve been putting off. Whatever it is, now is a great time to lean into that new year reset energy.
We get it: change can feel really hard. Old habits are sticky, and building new ones takes effort. It’s not just about motivation - you need a strategy that helps you actually make choices that stick. One effective way to do this is by using some of the principles from Motivational Interviewing.
Remember: Change is not about perfection. You’re human, and we all have our unique quirks and challenges which make us who we are. Just because it’s the new year, this doesn’t mean you have to change who you are or expect yourself to have it altogether – this is not the case for anyone! However, the ‘fresh start’ feeling can be a motivating, rejuvenating one, and a nice chance to reflect on your goals.
What is motivational interviewing?
Motivational Interviewing was originally a therapy tool, but you can use its ideas on your own, as a self-pep-talk or coaching framework. It’s about noticing what isn’t working for you now, considering the pros and cons of change, and guiding yourself through resistance in a way that feels hopeful, honest, and doable.
Here’s how to apply a few key ideas from motivational interviewing to your own New Year’s mindset:
- Show empathy to yourself
Acknowledge how you’re feeling about making a change, and normalise the different emotions you might be experiencing. Instead of judging yourself, admit that you’re doing your best. For example:
“I scroll on my phone when I feel anxious, and I know that probably doesn’t help long-term - but I get why I do it; it’s been my way of calming down.”
- See the change clearly
Think about where you are now versus where you’d like to be. What are you giving up, and what are you gaining? Ask yourself:
What does life look like if nothing changes? What benefits could come if I try something different?
This can help you connect with why this change matters.
- Roll with resistance
When part of you pushes back (“But I just want to feel better right now”), don’t ignore it. Instead, explore what’s behind the resistance:
What’s making this goal feel so hard? Are there small tweaks I could try?
Accepting that resistance exists helps you work through it, rather than getting stuck. Be gentle and kind with yourself and remember that change is hard, takes time, and no one does it straight away or ‘perfectly’ - small steps add up over time.
- Have faith in yourself
Revisit past wins - even tiny ones. Think about things you’ve managed to change before (like starting a morning walk or less people-pleasing actions). Reminding yourself your strength builds confidence: you’ve done this kind of work before.
- Ask open-ended questions
Try “What do I really want out of this change?” or “How might a feel a little better if I take one step towards this change today?” Let yourself talk through it. You don’t need big epiphanies - just honest reflection.
- Reflect — but don’t overthink
Regular check-ins help. You could journal, meditate, or just think quietly for a few minutes. Ask yourself:
How am I doing? What’s working? What’s not? Do I still care about this goal?
- Use “but” to reframe
When your inner critic shows up, use “but” to soften it. For example:
“I did say sorry today a little too much, but that’s ok. It’s a hard habit to change. At least I’m more aware of when I’m over-apologising and I can try again tomorrow. ”
“I spent too long doom-scrolling, but I’m going to try setting a timer next time.”
This simple word helps you stay realistic - not beating yourself up for slip-ups, but still moving forward.
Why this works for long-term change
- Ownership: You’re not forcing change from outside - you’re deciding it for yourself.
- Self-kindness: You acknowledge how messy change can be and accept that that’s okay.
- Realism over perfection: This isn’t all-or-nothing. It’s about small shifts that matter.
- Momentum building: Every time you reflect and adjust, you get more confident.
Practical, real-world tips to make this stick
Here are some simple but realistic ways to turn motivation into action:
- Break it into micro-goals: If your goal is “reduce phone scrolling,” start with 10 minutes less per day, or replace one session with a walk.
- Set reminders: Use simple cues - a sticky note on your desk, calendar alerts, or a habit-tracking app.
- Celebrate small wins: Did you pause before doom-scrolling today? That’s a win. Take note, feel good about it, even if the whole habit hasn’t gone away.
- Plan for bumps: Think ahead about what might trip you up (stressful week, emotional night) and brainstorm backup plans.
- Talk about it: Share your change goal with a friend or family member who supports you. Accountability helps, but also having someone you can vent to when things don’t go to plan.
- Reflect weekly: Take 5–10 minutes once a week to check in: what’s going well, what feels hard, what will you try next?
- Be kind to yourself: Use that “but” reframe whenever you slip. Remind yourself that setbacks are part of the process - not a sign you’ve failed.
Take one small step with THIS WAY UP
If you’re ready to make a meaningful change this year, one simple step you can take today is to start - or pick back up - a THIS WAY UP program.
It doesn’t have to be a big leap. Just registering, logging in, or completing your next module is a small action that can lead to big change. Our programs are designed to help you break down fears into manageable steps so you can work through them one at a time, building confidence and resilience as you go.
Along the way, you’ll be encouraged to celebrate small wins, normalise setbacks, and keep things feeling achievable rather than overwhelming. And to help you stay motivated, you can track your improvement in real time. Simply check your dashboard to see your progress laid out clearly - a visual reminder that the work you’re doing is making a difference.
If you’re looking for a gentle, doable way to feel better and create change that lasts, this is your sign! Your next step is right there waiting for you. You’ve got this.
Bonus download! Motivation Master: 6 steps to meaningful change
Once you’ve chosen a behaviour you’d like to focus on changing, this 6 step tool can help to build and maintain motivation to make it happen. Remember that creating lasting change takes time, and it’s normal to have ups and downs along the way. The key is kindness to yourself when things get hard, and perseverance – rather than perfection. Download and keep our 6 step motivational tool here.
If you’re not actually sure how you’re feeling, why not try out our ‘Wellbeing Test’? Our simple quiz will help you check your levels of stress, anxiety, or low mood.